A person who experienced a traumatic event will likely harbor trust issues with people around him or her. The feeling of being unsafe, of being unloved, and of being put down can greatly damage one’s mental and emotional health. For someone who is suffering from this unfortunate situation, daily existence may feel like a burden, and relationships may come off as avenues for more confusion or pain, resulting in an inability to connect and engage with others. Trauma does hinder one’s ability to articulate the feelings and thoughts in them.
If you’re the partner of the person suffering from trauma, understanding the experiences he or she went through will make you fully aware of how to extend support. Experiences such as these—which may be a one-time incident or a series of events—can cause profound mental and emotional agony:
— sudden death of a loved one
— being discriminated/ bullied
— physical, mental and emotional abuse
— calamities
— being neglected
— being involved in violence
Often, people who are harboring emotional and psychological wounds show some of these signs:
— nightmares and trouble sleeping
— stresses out quickly or has a high level of irritability
— isolation
— self-blame or feeling of shame
— struggling with anger
— low self-esteem
— anxiety
— extreme paranoia or hypervigilance
— difficulty controlling emotions
— panic attacks
Seeing one or several of these signs in your partner might discourage you and feel a bit unnerving. However, healing can come in the form of love and kindness. It may take time, but here are some approaches to start with:
Create an emotionally and physically safe environment
Trauma survivors need to be constantly assured that they are in a secure place, as safety and comfort reduce the feeling of distress.
Keep an open and loving communication
Your partner with a traumatic experience will gain a better understanding of their emotions, thus opening the door for open and clear communication.
Engage in fun, constructive activities
Whether it’s a day at the beach, cooking together, or watching TV, joyful bonding moments lessen feelings of anxiety and bad mood.
Offer support in managing their triggers
Practicing meditation or breathwork together can help calm their body’s fear response, guiding them to self-soothe.
Share The Idea Of Mindfulness
This technique is done by connecting with the world and your senses rather than what’s going on inside the head. One popular routine is the “5-4-3-2-1” routine. Here’s how it’s done: your partner should acknowledge 5 things they see, 4 things they can feel, 3 things they can hear, 2 things they can smell, and 1 thing they can taste. Doing this can calm them down.
Worried, helpless, and disappointed – – these are what we may feel when our loved one is traumatized. To say it’s an unwanted guest in a relationship is an understatement, and healing doesn’t come easy. But the power of love can do wonders, accompanied by dedication, compassion, and a conscious effort to help.
Remember that healing from trauma is easier with support. Don’t forget to seek professional help if needed.
